|
Just A Thought
23 April 2007, 20:15
Coldplay - Everything's Not Lost
I've been reading through my past entries recently and I realized how much I enjoyed my earlier stories. It makes me smile whenever I remember that particular day because I can still see it clearly in my mind. And in a way, I do miss those days, when everything seemed so far away and the only thing that truly mattered where those hours that you had to think and reflect. I was telling my friend how I felt that I could write better when I'm sad. And it's true, I think. I guess it's like when those rockstars can write better lyrics and make good songs when they are heartbroken. Not that I'm a rockstar or have ever had my heart broken, but you get the point. When you're sad, you just feel more, you know? So things just come out. And for me, writing about those feelings give me a better perspective as to how I am supposed to deal with things. I like to write down how I feel on paper because then things become more concrete for me. It's really how I operate. I need to see in detail, for example, the things I need to accomplish for the day. I make a list – cut-up into hours or minutes – my tasks for the day and I need to be able to complete it all at that time or else I get really irritated. Yeah, I know that doesn't say much about my flexibility, but I have been trying to be more accommodating to others. It's just that I get so used to being independent and doing things on my own that I tend to forget that other people are involved in my plans. But I've really been trying. Like I don't make such detailed plans anymore. Which is why maybe my writing has been changing. I mean, I feel like a different person. Like I've changed a lot in the past year. Yeah, like I'm not sad anymore. I mean I was never really sad, but I wasn't happy you know? Like I was just fine back there. (oh my, if I say like one more time, im gonna hit myself). Anyways there. I've been trying to get back into the groove of writing in this blog. And it's turning out harder than I thought. I do wish I could sound like the old entries here and entertain myself when I read it again. But I feel like when I read this after a few months I'll just be like (oh no) what was I thinking back then? Owel. But I still wouldn't want to be sad. I’d take the bad writing over feeling just fine.
|
