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Things, Change. But Not Really.
21 February 2009, 11:33
I wanted to write stuff about how I feel like time is flying by me and I'm growing up (or growing old) way too fast. But then I realized that I haven't really grown up. Not really anyways. So maybe I do have a job now and being all responsible and stuff, but I still am the same girl. I still do nothing in front of the computer but read gossip sites and increase my knowledge about useless celebrity info because really, what else is there to do online (a lot, i know. But i don't have the patience to discover what those things are. I'm not even really into youtube. Shocker. Hahaha). I watch the same TV shows (Disney channel anyone?). I still buy Archie comics (especially the ones in Booksale and gas stations..so much cheaper than the ones in the bookstores) and I don't even just read them while I'm on the toilet (TMI. Hahaha). So as much as I wanted to write about the wonders of being an adult, I realized that that's not really where I'm at. I'm enjoying living my childhood dreams while earning (some) means to do it. Like last Christmas, when I finally bought myself some cookie cutters and made my holiday cookies, complete with the hard frosting. I mean, it was some kinda crappy cookies, but they were something I've always always wanted to do and now I got to do them (even if only about half got eaten, and that was probably because the people at work were really just starving at that time, but that's beside the point).
For me, growing up now doesn't mean that things have to change drastically. To be perfectly honest, I feel like I'm back in high school in more ways than one (especially since I used to be allowed to drive back in college and now, i get dropped off and fetched..by my mom. Everyday). And this isn't some post on how I want to stay 23 forever or whatnot. It just that, for the longest time, I was always in a hurry to grow up. Yeah, I enjoyed having a childish side once in a while, but I always had the big picture in my mind. I had the plans and dreams all sewn up and I knew what I was working for all this time. But now that I AM old, I feel like slowing down a little. If any, I feel younger than I did at 18, when I was just gearing up for college. This isn't some quarter life crisis, and I'm not saying that I'm ready to throw away everything I've worked so hard for. It's just that, I finally understand what people mean about slowing down and smelling the flowers (or something like that). I haven't done anything drastic in my life, and I haven't exerted any effort really to break lose from my rigid life. But now I know that I can do that and maybe someday I will. But it sure is nice to know that I have the option to do so. :)
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